June 2011
The Headline Song
Joe Jonas
Joe Jonas - The Headline Song (Radio 1)
My giant tongue wouldn’t stop growing
A ghost stole our live savings
Stand aside, my bum’s five foot wide
My mate boiled my willyI’m so fat I broke the toilet
Six toilets actually
I fell for a sexy robot
I paint with my boobiesMy psychic dog has healing powers
There’s a time lord in my loo
Mosquitos made me pregnant (mm so pregnant)
I fart on men’s faces for money (oh yeah.. come on guys)I’m so fat I broke the toilet
Six toilets actually
I fell for a sexy robot
I paint with my boobiesWith my boobies, yeah.
THIS DESERVES A GRAMMY.
The person I reblogged this from deserves to be called beautiful everyday.
What if Tumblr was a country and you could live in a particular city depending on what you blog about
The inexplicable joy of finding someone who's interested in talking about your current obsession...
"Can I have a look at your laptop" →
On the outside:
“My laptop? Yes of course I’ll just go and get it! hahaha it’s totally fine nothing to see hehaha”
On the inside:
“ABORT ABORT LOG OFF TUMBLR LOG OFF TWITTER DELETE HISTORY OH MY FUCKING GOD LOOK AT THAT NC-17 FIC JUST SITTING OPEN IN A TAG WHAT THE FUCK SELF STOP LIVING DANGEROUSLY, CCLEANER OUT YOU COME DELETE ALL THOSE FILES GO GO GO OK OPEN GOOGLE OPEN BBC NEWS OPEN FUCKING GAMES.COM OR SOMETHING OK THIS LOOKS NICE AND INNOCENT HERE YOU GO MOTHER”
While she uses the laptop:
“I’ve fucking forgotten something I know it any minute now she’s gonna click on a fic or something oh fuck oh fuck oh fuck”
